Mr and Mrs Average

This just landed in our inboxes at work courtesy of a tabloid journalist looking for story-fodder...
“Are you, or do you know, Mr or Mrs Average? We are looking for someone who can answer yes to most of the questions below, and do a feature with them asking them their views about the world etc…

Do you know the words to God Save the Queen (first verse and chorus)?
Are you married with two children?
Do you own your own home, worth approx £190-210k?
Do you have more than 80 contacts on your mobile phone?
Do you work over 40 hours a week?
Do you own a Ford Fiesta?
Do you have 14 close friends?
Do you consider yourself working class?
Are you repaying debts or loans totaling more than £3,000 (excluding mortgage)?
Does your home contain one of the Harry Potter books?
Do you have three or more TVs in your house?
Do you go to the toilet six times a day?
Do you sleep approximately seven hours a night?
Do you think you're a good driver?
Do you do less than 30 minutes sport/continuous exercise per week?
Do you know how to cook at least four meals, including spaghetti bolognaise?
Do you drink at least three cups of tea a day?
On average, do you one foreign holiday a year?
Does your daily commute to work take 20-30 minutes (one-way)?
Do you believe in God?”

And thus I was left staring slightly open mouthed at the screen...

Average? How exactly? And as average as whom - your peers, our parents, the rest of the UK? How can that list be representative of the national average person – living up to your working-class roots by owning a £200k house, driving 25 minutes to your 8 till 6 job in your Fiesta, and coming home to spag bol cooked by your partner (eaten with your two kids), and a chapter of Harry Potter before your 7 hours kip? Squash on Tuesday, beers on Friday, church on Sunday, do it all again next week. Depressing really – a bit like that new Alpha ad…

Think hard now – do you know ANYONE who is all those things, let alone that person being you? (If so, and for some inexplicable reason you do want to take part, I still have the journo’s email!)

And yes, at the risk of starting another blog/ email meme, have a look down that list and see what you can answer yes to… Might tell you something about yourself, or indeed something about that list and our national priorities and interests.

I don’t know if I find it comforting (an affirmation of my place in the national collective identity) or worrying (an affirmation of the fact that I’m not so different to everyone else) that I answered yes to 14 of these, and no to 6. And no I’m not telling you which...

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